on manners and wrist-breaking

by Miss What's-Your-Name-Again?

Dear Sir,

I understand the considerable confusion it might bring you to be addressed on a blog normally dedicated to misguided students, but it’s summer break and I need someone to teach, and you are so terribly in need.  As a matter of fact, kids, particularly you boys, listen up too, because there are valuable lessons to be learned here.

Next time you approach a woman walking her dog, offering her a gratis martial arts lesson and invitation to your comedy club, do make sure to first stop and ask yourself, “Have I approached this particular woman before, offering her the same exact thing, roughly a week ago?”  Furthermore, when she begs off, telling you she has a second degree black belt in Taekwondo, it is impolite to then lecture her on what Taekwondo is (further impolite to be wrong about it,) and then to remark that, although you, “Like when women get themselves a little training,” she is unaware that her training in martial arts taught her absolutely nothing about defending herself in a practical situation.

Because perhaps this woman’s “little training” came from her father, a Grandmaster of such wide acclaim he was awarded a Doctorate for his work, making him a Grandmaster Dr. (and requested that his children refer to him as such, Grandmaster Doctor Daddy, for an arguably unreasonable, not to mention embarrassing, amount of time.)  And she was roughly one ignorant comment away from taking a very practical stab at breaking your wrist just the way he showed her how to when she was nine.  Her father might not have approved, but he would have understood.

Lastly, it is inconsiderate (not to mention inadvisable) to pet a stranger’s dog without first asking permission.


Whatever-Fake-Name-I-Gave-You (I forget, since this is the second time I’ve done it)




Grandmaster Dr. Cha Sok Park

(Grandmaster Doctor Daddy)